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Friends only for the most part.

Comment to be added (if you aren't already).

( Let's Talk About Bigfoot )

I have to be brave. I have to get over it and do things that scare me. Or else this is going to eat me alive.

1. Refuse to be anyone's consolation prize. I deserve more than that.
2. Learn to be more secretive again. I think I'm in need of a Margot Tenenbaum chapter.
3. Start singing in the shower.

It's really strange to think about where I was a year ago. And how much has changed. And, yet, how much has stayed the same.

I have learned a lot about myself. And how right I was before I questioned it.


Mostly, I wish I was Teddy Roosevelt. My Law, Diplomacy and Power professor was talking about him in class today and he sounds like he was a really funny guy. He would just pick up a stick somewhere, carry it in the white house and just bang it on stuff. He'd go out of his way to point at things and tap doors and things like that. That's just such a funny image in my mind. I like it a lot.



So I'll speak softly--

Where are you going?

Today was absolutely beautiful.

I love fall and all that it brings to my life. Including winter. And Christmas.

I'm so busy these days. But I like it, I guess. Keeps me in check. Keeps the cash flowing.

I want to do something artsy. I've been writing again. I think I want to go back to some mixed media things. And I want to make time to do it. Make myself a little studio.

I love my family so much. We are an absolute mess and I wonder every day how we're going to make it to the next, but I really do love us. Life is so short.

Mostly I love Dr. Kleber. I told him on Monday that I had watched The Alamo this weekend on AMC (with Billy Bob Thornton and Dennis Quaid) and that I was fascinated by Davy Crockett. I asked him if he knew of a good biography I could read on him and he said he wasn't sure. But then I went to lunch (or something...) and when I came back, "The Real Life Adventures of David Crockett" was scribbled on my notepad along with the author and the call number from the UofL library. I love that man. I hope I get to go camping with him in October.

Love,

Mary Kate

I want to be Ana Pascal.

And I need a big dose of punk rock. And a place of my own. And a new touch.



Maybe just an overall fresh start.



The difference this time is that I'm pretty sure I can't do it alone.

Wanna get out of here with me?

Headed down south to the land of the pines
And I'm thumbin' my way into North Caroline
Starin' up the road
And pray to God I see headlights

I made it down the coast in seventeen hours
Pickin' me a bouquet of dogwood flowers
And I'm a hopin' for Raleigh
I can see my baby tonight

So rock me mama like a wagon wheel
Rock me mama anyway you feel
Hey mama rock me
Rock me mama like the wind and the rain
Rock me mama like a south-bound train
Hey mama rock me

Runnin' from the cold up in New England
I was born to be a fiddler in an old-time stringband
My baby plays the guitar
I pick a banjo now

Oh, the North country winters keep a gettin' me now
Lost my money playin' poker so I had to up and leave
But I ain't a turnin' back
To livin' that old life no more

So rock me mama like a wagon wheel
Rock me mama anyway you feel
Hey mama rock me
Rock me mama like the wind and the rain
Rock me mama like a south-bound train
Hey mama rock me

Walkin' to the south out of Roanoke
I caught a trucker out of Philly
Had a nice long toke
But he's a headed west from the Cumberland Gap
To Johnson City, Tennessee

And I gotta get a move on fit for the sun
I hear my baby callin' my name
And I know that she's the only one
And if I die in Raleigh
At least I will die free

So rock me mama like a wagon wheel
Rock me mama anyway you feel
Hey mama rock me
Rock me mama like the wind and the rain
Rock me mama like a south-bound train
Hey mama rock me

I read a Wendell Berry book and an Ayn Rand book all in one day. Today.


My head might explode. Soon.



On to Tolstoy next.

We are each truly alone on this earth, despite our best chance.

Sometimes nothin' can be a real cool hand.

I'm so excited for this summer. I have high hopes. Classes are over and I'm in finals mode. I'll be really glad when it's all over.



PS- Who's in the mood for a summertime paint fight? I say we plan now so everyone can make it.

EARTHQUAKE!

So I'm house sitting at my parents' while they're down in Breckenridge County, working. This has been one of the roughest, most exhausting weeks I've had in quite some time. My poor family. I'm not sure we're going to survive Stephanie's teenage years. Someone please knock some sense into her (preferably in a violent manner) and let her know how good she has it (and that my dad loves her and really is a good man).

I only love Harrison Ford. And Gene Wilder. The Frisco Kid is one of those movies I could watch every day of my life. She-it.

In other news, I really don't know what to report these days. I'm having fun inserting feminist, secular and generally liberal thought into the discussion at McConnell Center events- I refuse to have half of the world's opinions discounted. So there it is.

Today was beautiful.

I guess I'm only sad about two things. My parents and only knowing how to associate with people 30+. I really need to crack this twentysomethings safe. But I really just don't feel like it. I'm perfectly okay with the fact that I only associate with men who already have their doctorates.

haha. oh the life of a non-slutty, academic 19-year-old. What can you do?

I'll take any advice.

I just filed my taxes. I get a whopping $51 back from the federal government. Woo.

Way for my parents to still claim me as a dependent. I told my mom she should buy me a bike with her big fat federal rebate/refund. hah.

In other news, Dr. Gregg is planning on hiring me on at the McConnell Center this summer so that I can help him with a few different PR and publications projects. Which is really exciting.

We're going to put out a major newsletter, chronicling the events of the center over the past few years. He also wants me to help with a project on the "Forgotten Founders of America" which will culminate on a book containing biographical information on the top ten (voted on by professors from all over the nation) as well as some of the more diverse founders that no one knows about. Which I think is pretty cool, since it'll include women and Native Americans.

Jackie: you have one week on our bet. Seven days. haha.

Also-- it snowed yesterday? GTFO, Mother Nature. I'm done with that.

BRING THE HEAT.

I really feel like everything is starting over. I might like that.

I'm actually enjoying this Abe Lincoln biography. I bought seven sweet books from the English Grad program book sale today. You should hit it up.

My sister leaves for NYC tomorrow morning. I can't believe my parents are paying for her to go. But that's another story entirely.

I'm quite ready for school to be over. I need to figure out housing from May 11 - forever. Anyone looking for a roommate to go in with on an apartment?

I feel a little sickly today. And I'm tired of cold rain.

Jacquelynn's apartment seems to be working out nicely despite the fact that she has no living room/dining room furniture. haha. I kind of love it.

I'm going to the Manual Dems/Reps debate Thursday. I'm excited to see my Manual loves.

The poor Dalai Lama.

Also,

Dear men of the world: take some initiative.



again and again

Oh my god, I love the McConnell Scholars.

Get me out of here.



Hey, D.C., thanks for having me up. Imnevergonnaleave.



I miss Uncle Ted.






And I want to go fishing.

A little bit of my past crept up on me today and I didn't like it. Move on winds, please. I'm doing chants and begging in dance for the sky to turn over.

In other news, Jac and I flew a sweet pocket kite today for a ridiculous amount of hours at the park. I loved every minute of it. I felt really silly because I don't know anyone other than the two of us who would dedicate that really goofy amount of time to putting a ninety-nine cent, piece of vinyl, fishing line kite into flight. But I loved it anyway. I could spend all of my time at the park. Easy.

I was really very content for most of today. Which is a strange feeling. But I embrace that.

I'm very excited for the St. Patrick's Day party. It's probably my favorite fake holiday for the following reasons:

1. I'm actually Irish.
2. I don't have to buy anyone anything.
3. Potato foods to the power of BubbaGump shrimp varieties.
4. Ridiculous amounts of spring.
5. All kinds of sick, festive things at the dollar store that only I would buy.

Anyway, way to be a 36-year-old woman, Mary Kate. Get outta here.

( oh, devendra. )

So since Thursday I've seriously been illin'. We're talking fever, cough, insomnia, weird visions, way too much medication. Basically, I died.

Anyhoo, throughout the whole saga I stayed at my parent's place because my new roommate is a drunken, drug-addict slut-whore. And, well, I guess the cold medicine got to me, because I kept reassuring my mom that life would be okay by quoting rap lyrics prefaced by, "In the eternal words of Sir Mix-a-lot..."


Anyway, ( all I'm sayin is )


So I don't know about you, but I'm dialing 1-900-MIXALOT.

Premature Ejaculation

I'm sorry this poem's already finished

- William Matthews